Grief, Pressure, and “Shoulds”: When the Holidays Trigger Pelvic Floor Symptoms
If December feels hard on your body, it’s not in your head. And you’re not alone. The holidays can be beautiful, but they can also carry added stress that leads to increased physical symptoms.
Maybe you’re navigating grief, a complicated family dynamic, sensory overload, or the pressure to “keep up.” Suddenly your pelvic symptoms show up louder with more urgency, pain, heaviness, or constipation.
That doesn’t mean you’re failing. It means your body is asking for help.
Pelvic pain and pelvic floor dysfunction are often deeply connected to the nervous system, especially when pain has been present for a while and your body starts amplifying threat signals (sometimes called central sensitization).
Why holiday stress can land in your pelvis
When life feels stressful (emotionally, socially, physically), your body often shifts into protection mode. Protection can look like:
Breath-holding or shallow breathing
Jaw and shoulder tension
Glute gripping
Pelvic floor guarding (“clenching” or “tightening” that occurs often subconsciously)
Digestive slowdown (constipation, bloating)
Increased urinary urgency/frequency (often due to tension holding patterns)
And for many people living with chronic illness, symptoms already overlap and stack up, so stress can be the match that lights the pile. If this is currently your reality, please know you’re not alone and there are ways to help yourself.
Give yourself grace
3 ways to soften the “shoulds” (without giving up what matters)
1) Plan a recovery buffer like it’s part of the event
If you go to a gathering, your plan isn’t complete without the “after.”
Some ideas to try:
10 minutes lying down with diaphragmatic breathing (bonus: add legs up the wall)
Electrolytes before bed when you get home
Red light therapy wrap around your lower back or neck & shoulders on the way home
An early bedtime (yes, really)
2) Use nervous-system “anchors” during the hard moments
When you feel your pelvic floor start to tense up, try this simple cue:
Inhale: “soften the ribs”
Exhale (longer): “melt the pelvic floor”
Just 3 slow breaths can help interrupt the spiral. If needed, take some deep breaths in a pelvic opening stretch like child’s pose, happy baby, or a deep squat. Happy baby is the most friendly on the knees!
3) Replace “pushing through” with “staying with myself”
A lot of chronic pelvic floor issues come from years of overriding signals. Holidays tend to magnify that.
This season, the win might be:
leaving early
sitting down
skipping the tight fitting clothing for a more comfortable, looser waistband
eating something gentle that agrees with you
saying no, without regrets or guilt
skipping the loud party in favor of a quiet neighborhood drive to see the lights
Taking the time to check in with your body and honor its needs always pays off, especially during the holidays!
Journaling prompt:
“If my loved one was feeling this way, how would I support them?”
When to get support
If you’re noticing increased pelvic symptoms with stress, you’re not alone. And you don’t have to push through or “just live with it.” A pelvic health plan can include nervous system regulation, breathwork, manual therapy, and practical strategies that actually fit your real life. Call or text (813) 434-0060 to schedule an appointment with Intuitive Therapies & Pelvic Health (ITPH) located in Tampa, FL. ITPH is a specialty pelvic health practice with a collaborative team of both physical and occupational therapists who provide integrative, hands-on care to reduce symptoms and improve your quality of life. Contact us today!
Medical note: This post is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended as medical advice or a substitute for individualized care. Please consult with your healthcare provider before making changes to your health.